song lyrics

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  1. Ask a Ph.D. student when his/her dissertation will be done*
  2. Tell someone they look tired, then suggest they get some sleep
  3. Ask a woman who has not directly told you that she is currently pregnant when she is due**
  4. Make enemies with the IT Department
  5. Make a pretty woman your wife
  6. Ask any student what his/her plans are after graduation
  7. Start any sentence with “Well, in today’s economy”
  8. Park over the line that clearly marks where one space ends and another begins
  9. Mess around with Slim
  10. Take libraries and librarians for granted

*It is also inadvisable to ask a Master’s student when he/she will graduate.  Basically, you shouldn’t ask graduate students any questions at all, except: 1) would you like free beer? 2) can I return those to the library for you? or 3) tell me about your work – but ONLY do this last one if they are CLEARLY FISHING for you to ask them about their work – otherwise you may face wrath, tears, or a complete nervous breakdown.

**It is also unacceptable to say “maybe you’re pregnant” to any female exhibiting flu-like symptoms.  Sometimes the flu is just the flu.


**BONUS – Don’t be this guy**

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I’ve had this post as a draft for months, but seem to have mostly encountered rain when I was out of town and not blogging. It’s supposed to rain today (well, it was supposed to rain yesterday too) – but I’d really like it to rain today. So this is a Cure-esque prayer for rain as much as anything.

I’m a big fan of the theme playlist. I have dozens of them. When I drove the 22 hours from my old home to my current one I mentally compiled theme playlists during one entire day of driving. I had notions of auditioning at my local college radio station only to get to my new town and find out that the most popular/iconic DJ’s signature is theme playlist shows – there goes my chance at radio greatness. So I just amuse myself with them.

My Rainy-Day Playlist (ultra-literal)

  • The Beauty of the Rain – Dar Williams
  • Singing in the Rain – Gene Kelly
  • Don’t Rain on My Parade – Barbra Streisand
  • It’s Alright – Indigo Girls
  • Rainin’ in My Heart – Willie Nelson
  • Purple Rain – Prince
  • Raindrops + Sunshowers – The Smashing Pumpkins
  • Have You Ever Seen the Rain – Creedence Clearwater Revival
  • Prayers for Rain – The Cure
  • Rain King – Counting Crows
  • The Rain (Supa Dupa Fly) – Missy Elliott
  • No Rain – Blind Melon
  • As the Rain – Jeb Loy Nichols
  • Raining in Baltimore – Counting Crows
  • Monday’s Rain – The Clientele
  • Lover, You Should Have Come Over – Jeff Buckley
  • Rain Check – Ani Difranco
  • Over the Rainbow/What a Wonderful World – Israel Kamakawiwo’ole
  • I Wish it Would Rain – The Temptations
  • Here Comes the Rain Again – Eurythmics
  • Rainbow Connection – Me First and the Gimme Gimmes
  • Over the Rainbow – Willie Nelson
  • Raining in Darling – Bonnie ‘Prince’ Billy
  • Rain City – Turin Brakes
  • When it Rains – Eli Young Band
  • Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain – Willie Nelson
  • Raining in Philly – J.B. Beverly and the Wayward Drifters
  • Over the Rainbow – Connie Haines
  • I Can See Clearly Now – Johnny Nash
  • Didn’t it Rain – Songs: Ohia
  • Who’ll Stop the Rain – Creedence Clearwater Revival
  • William, It Was Really Nothing – The Smiths
  • Plainsong – The Cure
  • Rainy Days and Mondays – The Carpenters
  • Bus Stop – The Hollies
  • Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head – B.J. Thomas
  • Mercy of the Fallen – Dar Williams

I know there are other rain songs, but these are the ones I own and ergo the ones on my playlist.  It’s a long list – Seattle long even though I live in the sunny south and as I look out my window the gray clouds are dissipating to reveal a bright blue sky.  I’m normally a sun girl, but not today.  To you it might sound strange; I wish it would rain.  (Oh how I wish that it would rain.)  If you haven’t heard that Temptations song, you really should.  It’s one of my favorites and on the cusp of perfect song-dom.

My assault on the world begins now.

<3 Ice (wo)Man, Power LL

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